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2012-11-18

Strange Numb Er Moments Followed By Stranger Numb Er Momentums

So, I am napping. PeacefuLLy. The room is dark.

The Wifey enters the room and asks softly, "Are you awake?"

I am thinking the answer must have been Yes because that is the answer I s'pposedly gave.

She said she was going to McDonald's and wanted to know if I wanted anything.

I said, sure, McNuggets (chicken), and then silence. She asked me if I wanted fries too. I said Yes.

She left but then in my semi-numbed mindful not yet awake state I wondered why I had only ordered two vegetables and no meat. Yes, looking back now, how on earth I would consider McNuggets a vegetable. Biz-czar

Laying there in the dark I suddenly thought of the two cards I mailed yesterday, stiLL in the numbed slumber state, and I wondered if I got the two cards into their properly addressed envelopes.

[Sudden eXaggerated sense of siLLy fear quake]

Because thinking now both cards were eXactly the same size, BUT one of them was being sent anonymously! The anonymous one didn't have a return address or my signature inside the card. It just had my handwritten cryptic message like "from someone who feels your pain". It was a siLLy Christmas card with an abominable snowman with a photo of Barak Obama's face in the head. Inside the printed part said something like "Happy Holidays from the Obama-ni-bal Snowman". Just as soon as I saw it I realized that I must must must send this card to my favorite best friend Susie who is veRy conservative. The other card was to my friend in prison. It was a birthday card that I turned into a Happy Birthday November Card, with a nice long message.

While stiLL in my numbed slumbered state I thought about the word 'number'. I was asking myself if you were 'more numb', would that be speLLed 'number' with a silent b, and then the logical neXt question was, "Is it possible to make someone number with numbers?" Then I decided in my slumb numbered state that, Yes, an eXample of numbering with numbering would be a hypnotist who teLLs a person, "You wiLL get veRy sleepy as I count backwards from 100."

I had absolutely NO sensation that any significant amount of time had passed. I heard my Wifey say that my food was here.

What?!?!? I didn't even realize that she had left.

While eating my Chicken McNuggets, I realized that I could probably consider the BBQ sauce another vegetable serving. Cooper seemed to agree.

I was hoping to get my wonderful new invention posted in my blog, but that story isn't quite finished baking just yet, maybe a few more days. Work, work, work ...

4 comments:

  1. I love getting cards. That is sweet of you to send them.

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  2. I can imagine that Cooper would love BBQ sauce.

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  3. It is a very good thing to send cards to people particularly your friend in prison. Friends in prison I suspect need to know their friends not in prison are still their friends. I agree about the BBQ sauce being a veggie.

    I look forward to hearing of your new invention. I am not capable of inventing things at present due to the cold dark damp weather in the UK. I find it subdues the creative part of my mind and so I need to work harder to keep things ticking along.

    I am not a lover of hard work but it does sort of leap out at me at times and shout . . . . . . LOOK AT MEEEEEE.

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  4. For somebody numb with sleep you didn’t half do well.

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