Won Thirty One

My wife up woke.

Oops, I mean, my wife woke up and walked down the hall.

Its a very short hallway.

I did not wake up because I have not been asleep.

I mean, I have not been to sleep in many many hours, not many many years.

She asked me, "Whattimeisit?"

I said, "Its 1:30" Hint: AM

She asks me, "Didyousay1:30?"

I say, "Yes, thats what I said"

She asks me, "Isitreally1:30?"

I say, "Well, it was but now its 1:31" Hint: Its still AM, we don't talk and wait to respond THAT long for it to possibly be PM.

She says, "Ha, ha"

ReaLLy, that is eXactly what she said, she didn't reaLLy laugh, even though I am pretending that she found it to be riotously hilarious, but she chose to supprreess her true feelings and simply gave me a smart-aleck response of ha then ha with a distinct staccato presentation. At this very second I am totaLLy confused on how to spell suppress, so I just put in a few eXtra letters. Just ignore the ones you don't need.


Here is a better story (?)

We are driving near a bank on Saturday.

No, "we" aren't driving, sorry, my son was in complete control of the automobile. I was just a passenger.

I tell my son, "Bads Near Stop"

He looks at me and asks what that means.

I point at the sign and say, "Its the opposite of Wells Fargo"

Its now 1:57 AM, I don't remember his reaction. He was wearing sunglasses so it was hard to tell at the time what his reaction was.

I reaLLy think there is laundry I could be doing. Or a few dirty dishes from suppa'. But no, I wanna type.

I should reaLLy go to sleep now before I accidentaLLy push the orange Publish Post button.


Update: A little while later she tells me, "Ithoughtitwasmorning"

I say, "Technically, it is morning. And, Spring is approximately one day old, too"

I am just a regular old almanac. Emphasis on the all and man.


Update: She asks me, "Whattimeisitnow?"

I think I have become merely a clock, is that all I am good for in life?

I say, "It is 7:32" and I don't round to the nearest 5 minute mark as is my custom.

She says, "Really,itrainedallnight"

I wonder why she suddenly has this 'Really' word response to my time announcements. Why would I be untruthful? I s'ppose I could buy a set of glow in the dark atomic clock syncronized time pieces for every room in the house with giant numbers, then she could always know eXactly what time it was. But I bet it would be difficult for her to break her habit asking me for the time, knowing I live with an iPad glued to my eyeballs and fingertips. I also s'ppose I could respond to her time requests with a standardized answer, "Its not quite twelve".