Episode 4
I was shopping all over town in the middle of a 4 hour spree that included almost everywhere and -thing except my favorite place, The Bookstore. About three hours into my journey of juggling priorities there was a sudden feeling of a message coming through my mental telepathic subsystem. Now, most of the time I stay so busy that I even forget about being a space alien trapped on earth. Well, at least now that I have my Morgan Building 'souped up' to handle local space travel, I am only trapped in this solar system. I spend my very busy time with the assigned human woman and our earth dog Cooper, always busy with domestic and messy chores and I'm so easily distracted.
But today's telepathic signal wasn't my usual native language or human thoughts. Suddenly the message came through again more clearly,
But today's telepathic signal wasn't my usual native language or human thoughts. Suddenly the message came through again more clearly,
"Italian Buffalo Disappointment" IBD IBD, I B D, I-B-D.
What did that mean and more importantly, who or what was sending the signal? Was I being rescued finally off the planet?!?!? Was it a coded message? My original assignment was supposed to have ended about 20 earth years ago. Puzzling. "Italian Buffalo Disappointment" - hmmm, I just didn't have a clue.
A few minutes later a third stronger signal resonated in my stomach - I suddenly understood the message content! Right before leaving the house I had started reheating the left over spaghetti in the microwave oven AND forgot it. This is NOT an unusual thing to have happen for me. I am always, well, maybe as much as 20 percent of the things I start to heat in the microwave I forget about and they ruin. I thought, "Wow! my food is sending me messages!"
When I started going through the mathematical probability of this happening, I thought, ... no. Food might make me burp but actual communication AND telepathic? Again, no, so I started looking for another source. Maybe the microwave oven itself was talking to me, after all, it does have a microprocessor in it and I had recently hooked it up to the Internet - POW! Just then the fourth message started my stomach actually jiggling like Santa Claus during a hefty ho-ho-ho, only I wasn't laughing and neither was the lady in the grocery store aisle a few feet away. Her eyes got big. She moved away very fast. She went straight out the door, didn't even finish her shopping. She walked very fast, so fast she even left her purse in the basket. (Don't worry, I turned it in at the front service desk).
Okay, back to the food, ... well, this fourth time I could finally tell who the sender was: Cooper!
He had smelled the trace amount of spaghetti smell leaking from the microwave oven and then I remembered telling him earlier at the house that I was heating up some buffalo spaghetti for us. SO ... ah, this wasn't a case of MENTAL telepathy, the mind wasn't the primary communication device, but it was the hollow stomach, both the dog and myself, being in tune. It was a case of MEmtAL Telepathy! The missing meal, so to speak, was being resonated in the poor dog's "mt" (empty) stomach, and consequently my empty stomach was tuned to the same frequency. So I sent him back a message of Alpo-apology and his return message was one of relief, knowing that he had reached me. He reminded me to pick up some raw hide dog chew bones, and I sent him back a message that I had already completed that task, and would be home in about an hour. He was happy and went back to his nap.
A few minutes later a third stronger signal resonated in my stomach - I suddenly understood the message content! Right before leaving the house I had started reheating the left over spaghetti in the microwave oven AND forgot it. This is NOT an unusual thing to have happen for me. I am always, well, maybe as much as 20 percent of the things I start to heat in the microwave I forget about and they ruin. I thought, "Wow! my food is sending me messages!"
When I started going through the mathematical probability of this happening, I thought, ... no. Food might make me burp but actual communication AND telepathic? Again, no, so I started looking for another source. Maybe the microwave oven itself was talking to me, after all, it does have a microprocessor in it and I had recently hooked it up to the Internet - POW! Just then the fourth message started my stomach actually jiggling like Santa Claus during a hefty ho-ho-ho, only I wasn't laughing and neither was the lady in the grocery store aisle a few feet away. Her eyes got big. She moved away very fast. She went straight out the door, didn't even finish her shopping. She walked very fast, so fast she even left her purse in the basket. (Don't worry, I turned it in at the front service desk).
Okay, back to the food, ... well, this fourth time I could finally tell who the sender was: Cooper!
He had smelled the trace amount of spaghetti smell leaking from the microwave oven and then I remembered telling him earlier at the house that I was heating up some buffalo spaghetti for us. SO ... ah, this wasn't a case of MENTAL telepathy, the mind wasn't the primary communication device, but it was the hollow stomach, both the dog and myself, being in tune. It was a case of MEmtAL Telepathy! The missing meal, so to speak, was being resonated in the poor dog's "mt" (empty) stomach, and consequently my empty stomach was tuned to the same frequency. So I sent him back a message of Alpo-apology and his return message was one of relief, knowing that he had reached me. He reminded me to pick up some raw hide dog chew bones, and I sent him back a message that I had already completed that task, and would be home in about an hour. He was happy and went back to his nap.
Currently there are four pieces in my blog that are part of the adventures of my space alien alter ego. They are titled:
Why I Moved To Oklahoma Today ... Suddenly
No, I Am The Sultan of Swing
3D TV from Green Gulch Texas
Italian Buffalo Disappontment
Why I Moved To Oklahoma Today ... Suddenly
No, I Am The Sultan of Swing
3D TV from Green Gulch Texas
Italian Buffalo Disappontment
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment