Absent For A Bit ....

I am away for a little while working on a few or more episodes for The Adventures of My Space Alien Alter Ego story ... will return (to Earth) soon!

Notice: Blogger has screwed up and lost a bunch of photos out of my blog! They are replaced with a gray silhouette of a human head. I will eventually get them replaced with the correct photo, it may take a while to find and fix everything. So some of my stories don't make much sense without their photos, sorry for the inconvenience.

esbb

2016-05-28

I Wonder If There Is A College Degree for This

Some people are into time management, wild life management or managing their 401K stock market portfolio.

I am forced into Dog Biscuit Management. 

When Santa Claus first got the younger dog Pepper for me in December he ate everything at a voracious pace, most likely after living a life of extreme scarcity. But after living here 5 months he has figured out that he has hit the doggie sweepstakes, and suddenly has become very nonchalant about eating things.

This suddenly blew up veRy early last Sunday morning after giving both dogs their dog biscuits while I was trying to make coffee. There was a veRy loud furry fury from the living room from The Big Dog, Cooper, as he most likely had finished his three items and was moving on to Pepper's uneaten items. But I am the alpha leader of the pack and shut them down pretty fast. 

So I have to be careful every time I give them treats. I am trying a new technique today of putting Pepper's treats on the kitchen floor on the south side, where Cooper rarely goes, and giving Cooper's to him in the living room. But Pepper still carries his treats into the living room.

I try.

2016-05-20

No, I Am Not A Thief

On any given night there is a strong chance I will be woke by a stray dog in the neighborhood. I sleep with my window open.


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It has decided to be Spring finally and it can't decide when to stop raining, so it has made it difficult to mow, and it is too cold too often. But at least it isn't snowing here like it has been in South Dakota.

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I had a bizarre thing happen at the diner. I sat down at the community table in the chair nearest the kitchen so I could chat with Sandy the owner and have a beverage. It was last Saturday evening late and my wife had already fed me a huge supper at home.

After maybe an hour I was momentarily alone as Sandy had wandered off to perform some task and I was reading some news, when suddenly from the kitchen through the vertically narrow window for food delivery the owner's grandson, the chef, asks me if I would like a sandwich.

Bear in mind it is not uncommon for me to both give and receive food as a gift at the diner, my home away from home. I am always sharing new recipes, home made brew and stew, a birthday cake or two, to name but a few. So I ask what kind of sandwich, and Gabe tells me it is an egg and bacon sandwich, but just as he was fixing to hand it to me declared, "Oh, I forgot the cheese!" and he sets it back down and jokes about how masterfully he cuts a piece of cheese with surgical skill, we laugh, and I ask for a side order of mustard, which he puts a spoonful and a half into a small glass container. I remembered that I had promised to get him some cake soon, but I haven't baked in quite a while.

So I thank him and simply turn to sit back down at my spot, and I get to about the middle of the second bite of sandwich even though it has LETTUCE on this sandwich, which I thought was bizarre.

Suddenly Sandy appears exasperated semi shouting, "Ernie! Why are you eating Hawk's sandwich!!!"

I am taken aback, and I said, "What?!?!? Gabe offered me a sandwich, so I just ate it! He asked me, 'Ernie, would you like a sandwich?'" Somehow Gabe thought it was my order, and what he probably said was, "Are you ready for your sandwich?" not wanting for me to have to wait for the waitress to get back to deliver it just 6 feet and get cold.

The waitress had seen me from across the room get the food from the window and had not heard any of my interaction with Gabe, so she had talked to Sandy before confronting me. So then everyone cracked up laughing and started teasing me about stealing food. Of course, I returned the favor.

The customer named Hawk was sitting in the closest booth to the south of me and he enjoyed the episode too. As the second sandwich arrived in the delivery window the waitress exclaimed, "Ernie, don't steal that second sandwich!!" and laughed, to which I waited until she delivered it to Hawk to say across the room, "Be sure to charge him for 2 sandwiches!!!" which cracked up everyone to laughing again. There were a few more lines that I have forgot by now.

About 5 minutes later Sandy decides to join me back at the community table with a plate of food, and I promised not to eat any of it. She laughed, and left to go back to the kitchen, AND what appears next?!?!?!? Sandy brings me out an unrequested bowl heaping with strawberry and chocolate ice cream!!!

She lets me know that the ice cream is actually a gift to her from another regular diner patron named Frankie. I tell her that I rarely receive things from Frankie, that my wife is usually the recipient of his gifts, as he always brings her things from the grocery store, as my wife cuts his hair. BUT that day I had actually received TWO things from Frankie indirectly, the ice cream being the second. But I told Sandy there was absolutely NO way she would ever be able to guess what Frankie had given me to give to my wife earlier that day. He had me follow him out to his truck at our place of business in order to give me an old dirty plastic bucket!!! He had given my wife one a couple months ago so that our dogs could have a larger water bowl at the house. And now they were getting another bucket for outside water.

So Sandy sits down to eat her supper and tells me that my event of eating the sandwich tonight reminded her of an old customer named Denver, now deceased, who used to come into the diner and would stand at the north end of the bar - Sandy turning left to point at the spot just across the aisle - and he would always drink these short bottles of beer (I forget the brand). She said that one night she caught Denver walking out the front door with an expensive compound plate and insulation pan underneath it piled high with hot Mexican food that he had taken right out of the food delivery window when no one was noticing! She hollered at him, "Denver! Get back here with my expensive plate and I'll put that food in a to-go container for ya!" So that explained why there had been several sporadic episodes where the waiter and the chef had gotten into arguments about missing plates of food, where Denver had absconded with meals. He would just wait for something of interest to show up and run off with someone's food.

2016-05-09

An Egg Sell Lent Dream

I just woke from a simple short dream in which my wife walks into the room and announces that I will no longer be allowed to have pet roosters (yes, plural)

First, I have no pet roosters
Second, I have no desire to have pet roosters
Third, why do I have this sudden desire to immediately start building a chicken coop?!?!?
Fourth, why did I think that 'Kanga' was such a great name for a pet rooster? Hold it, no, 'Kanga Rooster' is a great name for a pet rooster. 

Googling 'prefabricated chicken coop'

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Well, I finally found something unique to give my wife for her birthday. I got an e-mail from the John R. Kasich presidential campaign letting me know that all their merchandise is FIFTY percent off!!!! 
(See, I am a true fan, I knew his middle name.)

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So, Cinco de Mayo celebrates an 1862 military battle defeat of the French army by the Mexican army. I think that means we can create a holiday for any day where some battle took place by any pair of nations. I think that will limit us to only 365.25 days out of 365.25 days of the year.

2016-05-01

Do We Have a Serial Killer or a Hit Man on the Loose?

Interesting Borger News: on Monday morning at the diner Sandy just barely avoided being shot while in the kitchen. 

She had just turned to go into the north prep room from the kitchen and a bullet came in the huge window right at where her head had just been standing by the grill. The bullet then went through a frig and a bottle of salsa then after it came out of the refrigerator it entered a bottle of some cleaner but the liquid changed the trajectory suddenly 90 degrees where it then ricocheted off a few more surfaces entering at least one more room leaving a bit of an exit wound in the wall. When Sandy heard it she initially thought her deep fat fryer had exploded.

Sandy brought a 45 ACP bullet from her house to compare it to the second hole, the frig entry point and it was about the same size.

The second entry point was a few inches higher than where the bullet came through the glass and so it seemed to be on a slightly upward trajectory as it entered the building, so a rough calculation seems that the shot was fired by someone in a car on Main Street, rather than a higher position or a long distance shot which would have had to have cleared the building across the street and the huge number of stationary tanker railroad cars on farther east.

Thankfully our Sandy survived intact.

[I took plenty of photographs which I will try to get from my camera later.]

2016-04-06

Republican Pennsyl Mania

This data shows that Republican voters in Pennsylvania want to have their cake and eat it too. Kasich polls last among the Republicans BUT performs better against the Democrats in a general election match up.


2016-02-14

Puzzle: Solve 6 + 4 = 4



I saw this puzzle on Facebook, and solved it by changing the 6 to a 0, to 0+4=4

Then someone else took a match from the + to change the 6 to 8, 8-4=4

Then another person changed the 6 to a 5 and then the right 4 to a 9, to 5+4=9

Then I thought about using other number bases besides base 10, and found this solution in base 9:

Change the right 4 by moving the horizontal piece, so that 4 changes to 11. Then 11 in base 9 equals 10 in base 10
6+4=11

2016-02-06

The Last and Lost Jaguar in the United States of a Mirror of Culls

I walk into the living room to tell my wife about the news story I have just read about the last wild jaguar named El Jefe that roams in Arizona. It is s'pposedly the only known jaguar in the U.S. and likely part of a group of jaguars that are in nearby northern Mexico. There is a conflict concerning a new open pit mine that would endanger El Jefe's wandering life style.


I tell my wife that there is only one jaguar left in the United States and she is amazed and asked how they know that. When I start to eXplain the techniques the scientists use to track and record the animal, she laughs and says, "Oh! I thought you meant Jaguar the automobile."

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Yesterday was half filled with cooking, both gumbo and spaghetti. So as part of a long birthday celebration for my friend who is a co-owner of the diner that I frequent, I gave her a portion of each food plus a bottle of my beer from my 3rd batch, an American Cream Ale. Today I will make her a German Chocolate Cake, so she can enjoy it on her day off tomorrow.

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On Monday I started my 4th beer batch. It is a Witbier of the style like Blue Moon Belgian White. I will transfer it from the primary to the secondary fermentation tank today or tomorrow. So I have now tried making 3 different kinds of beer, and enjoyed the American Light, and American Cream Ale. All these kits come from a company called Brewer's Best. My dog Pepper destroyed one of my jugs of water while I had gone to the store very briefly to get a piece of equipment for the extra mash stage of the Witbier. So I ran both dogs outside so I could make beer in peace, otherwise Pepper would have been constantly in the way.

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The Iowa caucus was bizarre. It seemed so undemocratic with coin tosses and delegates and super delegates. I don't understand why there isn't simply voting and then deciding a winner based on who gets the most votes. I was so overjoyed that Trump didn't win. I didn't care about who won but only who lost. 

You can tell Trump is starting to really lose it mentally by his increased use of profanity and the choice of which bad words he uses. I wouldn't be surprised by anything now. I am thinking he might as well bring a Moslem "terrorist" on stage at his next rally and strangle him with his bare hands. (I am not encouraging him to do that, I am just thinking what is something bizarre, and that is just one of many things, but I won't bother you with the others.) I am just surprised that no one has made an assassination attempt on him yet. He has white supremicists backing him. He has irritated so many people. The British Parliament debated banning him from their country. Putin likes him and then Trump gave a bit of praise to the leader of North Korea. If someone would have created a movie a year ago about all the things of the Trump 2016 campaign, people would have thought it was unrealistic.

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I have had fun this week converting an old laptop running Windows 7 with an upgrade to Windows 10. It has been rather smooth, and I have seemed to be able to get the latest versions of my business software to run on Windows 10. So I have more confirmation testing to do before I upgrade my main computer used for design and manufacturing. I will also be doing my first hard drive to SSD upgrade most likely next week.

2016-02-01

Cooper: Lasagna Delivery Service Complainer

As I was preparing the dogs' food this morning, Cooper started complaining in a sad low volume whine. I told him, "Be quiet, there are dogs in Ethiopia who are not getting [what you are getting] lasagna for breakfast. Several of them."

And then about 14 seconds later I remembered that Italy invaded Ethiopia [in 1936], so there might actually be several Ethiopian dogs who had lasagna this morning.

Link to Ethiopian Lasagna Recipes:
https://recipes.sparkpeople.com/great-recipes.asp?food=ethiopian+lasagna

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I am trying to understand why anyone would think this is a valid news story:

Shark Eats Smaller Shark at South Korean Aquarium

This isn't "news" - fish have been eating fish for a veRy long time.

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At first I thought 'Ted' Cruz, besides being Canadian, might secretly be a TMNT, but then I saw there was a spelling diphpherence between his real name 'Rafael' versus the TMNT 'Raphael'. Then I thought, does the U. S. Constitution require you to be a human to be president; can you be a turtle?!?!?!?

Because turtles come from eggs, this would not be a 'birther' controversy, but rather a 'hatcher' one.

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Yea!!! Better Call Saul, season "won", is finally on Netflix. Winter is over, I have a reason to stop hibernating.

2016-01-27

Design Rejected By School Admin

I was asked to create a design for a school class T-shirt for a local school. 


The graduating class is 2017, and they wanted to incorporate the number 17 as an abstract X in the two words WE'RE NEXT. They aren't the current graduating class, but they're next. At first it seemed like a strange design, but after playing with font choices it grew on me. I purposely put the 1 on top of the 7 with the spacing between the numbers to indicate they were layered separate elements, yet stylistically combined to create an abstract X. The 1 is on "top" and rotated left and the 7 below rotated right seemed to be the logical way (to me) to read the numbers as a 17, the mind interpreting the 1 first then the 7.



The customer seemed very pleased, and began the process of collecting orders from other students, so we could begin the printing process.

BUT ... the design was rejected by the school administration because they said it resembled a Nazi swaztika! 

I looked at several examples of Nazi swaztikas online, and they seem to always be solid and symmetrical about a rotational axis at 90 degrees. Our X is incorporated as part of a word, and is meant to be separate elements of 1 and 7 layered and they aren't solid, there is a gap. The line width on a swaztika is very uniform width throughout the entire design, and our design clearly is not uniform width.

2016-01-24

Donald At The 5TH

I am thinking perhaps Trump had drank a fifth of something, causing him to say this:


"I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, OK?" Trump told an enthusiastic audience at a Christian school, Dordt College, "Its like incredible."

I am hoping that Donald will go ahead and do that, and that the person he shoots is himself.

The 5th Avenue that Donald speaks of is of course, New York City, which is currently in a blizzard. So we might get double lucky and he will go outside and freeze as well.

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I love this headline!!! It appears that Jeff Bezos has turned himself into a rocket, yes, that would be a first, amaz-on-ing.


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From Thursday in my car
I was just now so hilariously confused at the busy 4 way stop at the intersection of 5th & Main because a f-'ing idiot in a gray Camaro did a U turn in the MIDDLE of the intersection. It was so majestically stupid that I applauded.

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Pepper has made progress by learning to play fetch with a tennis ball. He has caught it several times in mid-air.

2016-01-16

Wal-Mart Dis Disappearing While Meteorite Guns Are Appearing

I think its strange when someone writes an article with the headline: 

"Walmart to Close 269 Stores, Lay Off 16,000 Employees", 

BUT then the fourth paragraph from the end is:

Also Friday, Walmart announced that as many as 405 new stores would be opened worldwide during its next fiscal year, with a focus on large warehouse stores and suburban areas.

So ... the net effect is Wal-Mart is actually in the process of growing.

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Pepper made progress today: He caught a tennis ball in mid-air!

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I love how the people running for President talk about, 'America', all the time. They are seeking to lead a country and they don't even use the correct name.

The Americas, I believe, are really both continents, North -and- South. So when Ted Cruz was born in Canada, he was born in, you guessed it, America. Hahahaha

(No, I am not a Cruz-ader)

'Make America Great Again' ?

No, I don't think that is really possible, for the simple reason that it never really ever stopped being great.

I will just be glad when this eXtremely bizarre presidential campaign is OVER.


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I feel terrible.
Why?
I am in a strange state of pain from being jerked awake by starting to fall off my bed after falling asleep too close to the edge, and then waking up and finding yourself rolling off the bed.
I had been reading with my iPad propped up on the nightstand. 
So it wasn't just falling off the bed but also the process of almost hitting my head or face into the nightstand as well.
PLUS...this isn't a rare occurance, sadly, I did this yesterday, too.


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So, someone wants to pay $1,000,000 for a firearm with most of its parts made from a meteorite? I was under the impression that rocky planets, such as earth, were basically an agglomeration of meteorites. So the only difference between an ordinary firearm and this one is when the metal arrived, not necessarily the source.


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Todays Gunny Funny:


If the president is successful in taking away all our guns, then the band 'Guns And Roses' can rename themselves 'Neuroses'.


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Today's New Word: Ambi-dogs-trious 
I have learned how to pet/rub/massage two dogs at the same time.





2016-01-01

Happ Ne Yea & y w r

(From Jan 1st 2016 PM)


I am at the diner watching people play the card game 31 at the community table. The guy on the west side of the table is drunk and has just started causing problems. The two guys on the east side are telling him they want his mother's phone number so she can come down to the diner and give him a spanking. The drink got a lot louder and the owner came out a couple times to tell him to settle down He mumbled an apology.

Meanwhile the song, "The Boys From Oklahoma Roll Their Joints All Wrong" is playing on the juke box.

The drunk just asked me what I said, but I told him I had said nothing.

Suddenly the song "Easy Like Sunday Morning"

He asked "Who played this song? It's a good song"

I lied and said, "I did"

Of course, I was just messing with him, as I had not left the table.

He said, "All right!" and put out his hand to for me to shake it, so I did.

He told the elderly man to my right, "Harold, if you ever need a drunk to work for you again, just give me a call."

He then asks Harold if he was a good worker. "Not when you are drinking."

A small child came into the diner to get the diner to get the drunk. He had a ride home.

I left to go groc shopping. As I was leaving the song "People Are Crazy" by Billy Currington.

2015-12-25

No Know Bernie

I was sitting in my office chatting with my wife. She noticed an ad on a Facebook screen that had incorporated Bernie in it. She asked, "What does 'Borger For Bernie' mean?"


I told her that it was a reference to Bernie Sanders, and she asked me who he was. I asked her, do you not know who Bernie Sanders is?!?!?!?, to which she replied she did not. I think she lives in an apolitical mind set, or only pays attention to things her customers talk about. Obviously she has not paid any attention to my conversations about Bernie. 

I told her that she just might be the only non-comatose person in the United States who did not know who Bernie is. She laughed and said, thanks for comparing me to people in a coma.

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I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I am somewhat trapped in Borger because of the predicted snow and ice storm scheduled to arrive later today. I had no intention of asking someone to drive on icy roads to take care of my dogs while I go out of town. I think there are also heavy rains scheduled in the destination spot as well.

Pepper, the new dog, is starting to get things figured out. He is needing lots of attention from me. I think he has figured out that cheese is associated with the 9 PM crickets sound on my iPhone alarm.

It appears I am starting Christmas Day with a veRy severe headache.

I am cooking something new today: Shrimp étouffée

They had a powder mix at the groc store along with frozen raw shrimp that has been de-tailed. It appears they left off the correct É for the first letter on the packaging.




2015-12-14

Our New Furry Friend, Pepper

We discovered a rescue dog that needed a home, and I got him just as soon as I could this morning, in spite of being given the wrong address to the facility.


This is our new dog Pepper. I am at home today on mutt-urnity leave, getting him adjusted to his new surroundings and meeting Cooper. He is a German Shepherd-Huskie mix like Cooper, only darker colored.

It wasn't until an hour after I got home that I realized that both dogs' names end with -per. It was quite by accident. My wife and I early this morning were going down a list of common German Shepherd names and I realized that Pepper would match his coloring. I had seen one photograph of him on Facebook from the local rescue site.


Pepper and Cooper seem to be getting along just fine. December is a good dog month for me. On December 30th it will mark my 10th year to have had with Cooper.

2015-11-17

Novembernados

We had an eXciting evening last night as tornados ripped through our area. The Haliburton oil field services facility in nearby Pampa was wiped out by a twister that I heard was a mile wide. I have added a snapshot of the weather radar that has the rather skinny appearing but rather long storm. It stretched from southern Texas to northern Nebraska at this point around 8 PM.





I almost forgot about the hail.


A local dog got lost and wound up in our back yard. Luckily it had a tag with an address and phone number. So its owner got it shortly after the worst part of the storm. It was a pretty & young Huskie named Kola. So now Cooper has been wanting to go outside practically once an hour or more, sniffing the ground, wondering where he went. This behavior, through the night, irritated my wife, who kept getting woke up by Cooper to go outside. How come "our" dog suddenly becomes "my" dog when he gets in trouble?

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So, Donald Trump made an anouncement that he wanted to shut down mosques. I wonder if he has ever heard of the concept of separation of church and state? Maybe someone advised him about it because he softened his line to inspecting mosques. If the government never managed to shut down the horrible Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka Kansas, then they have no business shutting down anyone else. I will be glad when his cam-pain is over.

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I have had a great time making, eating and giving away bierox to my friends. This batch has been much better than the previous one. I put too much garlic and not enough cabbage in the previous batch. This has been my fourth time to make bierox since late September.

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The ISIS attack in France seems veRy bizarre. ISIS seems like they are total idiots, useless beings. They seem to be about as worthwhile as scorpions.

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I think I may start reading Samuel Beckett.

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I found out about a product and company called Martin Jetpack from New Zealand. They seem to have a very interesting device.

http://martinjetpack.com

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EVER TRIED. EVER FAILED. 
NO MATTER. TRY AGAIN. 
FAIL AGAIN. FAIL BETTER.
- Samuel Beckett

"We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don't know." - W.H. Auden



2015-11-06

Texas Gas Non-Service, A Division of nONE Gas

We have properties that use natural gas supplied by Texas Gas Service. One is residential and the other is commercial. My wife handles the residential payment and I pay the commercial because I collect rent from the cosmetologists and barber who work at my building and so I want to be sure they always have heating and hot water.

I dislike paying the gas bill on a monthly basis because they charge $1.50 for each transaction, so I pay them an excess of 3 to 6 months worth at a time. This can mean that I have a credit on the business property account sometimes of several hundred dollars. But my wife prefers to only pay one month at a time, which results in sometimes the gas being shut off for non-payment (today). A rather cool November day, so I have been keeping my nose warm with coffee and a cup of chicken noodle soup. Thank you electrically powered microwave oven.

So I am sitting here at home instead of working, waiting for the gas man to come by to turn it back on.

Ironically if you pull up the website for making payments you can see both accounts under the same log-in AND at this moment and yesterday when they turned it off, the amount of money we owed for back payment for the residential service is LESS than the credit amount that I still have for the business property. And also consider that the vast majority of time the credit value exceeds anything owed by at least a hundred dollars.

Deeply Ironic: When I tried to make a payment at their website last night it failed miserably, multiple times.

Plus they have a reconnection fee, I think it is $50.

We have been buying gas from this company for over 35 years. Its not like we are going to suddenly leave town and disappear without paying.

Solar power is looking more possible with a backup generator, along with electrical appliances to replace the gas kitchen stove and hot water heater.

UPDATE: I watched the serviceman from the gas company reconnect my gas service. I discovered something(s) interesting.

Not only had they gone to the simple trouble of turning the supply valve before the meter to the OFF position and locking it, they had also temporarily loosened up the gas meter and had put a PLUG in the exit side of the meter! THEN after he had put everything back together and checked it for leaks, he painted the entire piping from where it exits and enters the ground on each side of the meter all the way back to the meter. I asked him why they did that (to a line the looked freshly painted already) and he said it was for corrosion prevention. But I think it is also a measure to check for tampering with the piping connections (!) in the future.

In high school we made a methane gas generator that collected gas from decomposing organic matter. We collected the gas in an inverted plastic trash can that was inverted in a slightly larger container of water. Our reaction vessel was an old hot water heater tank that had the top cut off, then had a rubber gasket to seal in the gaseous products. I think we used an old inner tube from a truck tire for the gasket source. We also built a solar collector to create hot air. We had it right outside our science classroom. During my last year of high school I had three separate classes of chemistry, physic and an alternative energy. My teacher was Mr. George Sturtz.

2015-10-29

Paha Sapa Weeped for Me

I have been veRy busy and distantly away.

I spent a week in South Dakota visiting several relatives. I mainly stayed with one cousin who is my primary male friend. We normally chat or text several times a week.

So this trip I brought along several ingredients and baking equipment. I taught him how to make bierox, lasagna and a German Chocolate cake. He called my wife to tell her he was kidnapping me and was refusing to let me go home to Texas! She strongly disagreed and said I had better be coming home that particular day (the scheduled last day of my trip). 

As I was leaving the Black Hills they were crying (raining) because I was going back to Texas. I said, "Its  going to be okay Black Hills, Ernie will be back next year to see you." And they stopped crying (it stopped raining.)

It was my animal-est time to ever visit South Dakota. It was quite green and there were plenty of deer, turkey, and antelope. I didn't see a single deer until the last 5 miles to my cousin's ranch, then I saw at least 20 in that stretch of road. A couple mornings later I went out shortly after the sun came up in order to examine the massive John Deere combine that we were working on. When I came out of the building there were at least 25 wild turkeys around me. They started to move away from me as soon as I appeared but mainly walking, practically no flight or running. I took several photographs, but then slowly that group of 25 turned out to be only half of the group as another 25 came around from the north side of the building, a few almost walking right into me.

I did prove that the deer of South Dakota are smarter than the deer of Nebraska. I ran into one out of two deer that I saw in Nebraska on my way home. It smashed my front grille and damaged the support mechanism, so I think it may take at least a 1000 dollars worth of parts, but I may be able to fix everything myself. 

I did manage to buy stamps for postcards before my trip, so I wrote to my friend in prison and my friend in London who has sent me many postcards from probably every journey she has taken while living in Europe. 

I returned home to TOO much work in my printing business, but we managed to get the critical large order done just in time. I think sprained the bottom of my right foot.

After not dying from the week's worth of work done in four days instead of seven, I recuperated a little and made bierox again for my wife and myself. I made her's with beef, and mine with a mixture of buffalo and pork sausage.

Cooper was veRy glad to see me. He usually has a brief period right after I get home from a long journey where he will complain loudly about me being gone. But I seemed to have circumvented that ritual by making sure to bring him a fresh chew bone just as I walked in the door. My wife didn't let him know I was coming home until she heard my car arrive, otherwise he complains moaningly and stares out the window or lays on the floor staring at the front door.


2015-10-28

AIG As Three Vowels

Today's Dumb Business Joke:

Billionaire investor Carl Icahn is calling for the company AIG to split up into 3 companies. At first I thought, "That would be easy, just call the new companies 'A', 'I', and 'G'. But it gets a bit complicated, because the G of AIG stands for 'Group', and if you are going to Ungroup the company then the new names would be A, I, and U. But based on the amount of money involved with the federal government bailing out AIG during the recent financial crisis, they should call them I O U.

2015-09-29

At the Corner of Jess-less & Kermit

I took these photos in Rapid City. It appears someone likes to take Jess street signs. 

The first photo is just to the west of the intersection of Jess and Kermit.


This the intersection at Jess and Kermit in Rapid City


If you look very closely at the metal below the Kermit sign you can see where the Jess sign used to be, perhaps it is weathering or adhesive remnants.

2015-09-20

The Queen of Alaska and an IQ Test Request

Who knew that aLL it would take is a boy from Texas building a clock, for Sarah Palin to finaLLy admit she is the Queen of England. I demand to see her birth certificate!

My question: Is this a common phrase of sarcasm, "... then I am the Queen of England." ? I don't think I have ever heard it before. Maybe it is something from Alaska.

I have built several monstrous looking devices while playing with electronics and sensors with wires going all over the place. Arduinos are great fun! I also "souped" up gas chromatographs at work in the lab, which my boss nicknamed, "Godzilla". The important thing to remember about determining whether something is a clock or a bomb is that there is generally a significant portion of the device that is clearly the explosive material.

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Apple disappointed me severely. I have been waiting for YEARS for them to finaLLy have multitasking on my iPad. So today I found out my iPad is new enough model that it runs iOS 9 .... BUT old enough that they didn't include multitasking with my particular model. Windows PCs have had multiple windows for a few DECADES running on much much much weaker equipment and memory models. Big fail .... For some reason I can not figure out how to do all the nifty new things in Notes.

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I wondeR hoW manY messeS I caN makE witH A singlE cuP oF coffeE.
So far this morning I am up to two.
I keep b umping into things that are obviousl y in the w rong place.

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So ... it took someone on the Nobel Peace Prize committee 6 years to finally admit that giving Obama the peace prize in 2009 was a mistake. I am pretty sure it didn't even take me six SECONDS of time to determine that it was improper.

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The headline says, KY Clerk: I am being forced to disobey God
WRONG!!! No you aren't. Just quit your job if its incompatible with your belief system.

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This is stupid logic and a stupid headline:
With No Other Choice, This Student Resorted to Prostitution to Meet NYU's Soaring Price
No one ever HAS to resort to prostitution.

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My opinion on photo IDs for voting: If the government requires me to show a photo ID in order to visit someone in prison or purchase alcohol even though I'm over three times the age limit, then a photo ID should be required when changing elected officials. BUT ... it should be just as easy for poor people and minorities to get photo IDs as rich white people.

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I surprisingly find it delightfuLLy comforting that there are witches in New York who have banded together to defeat Donald Trump with spells, even though I don't believe they have any real power. I am just waiting now for Trump to brag, "Witches? Oh, witches love me! You just wait and see, it'll make your head spin so fast, just like Linda Blair in that movie 'The Exorcist'. Nobody does exorcisms better than Trump, nobody. Or bigger. I will get the witch vote, especially the Mexican witch vote."

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Rick Perry mentioned that a broken clock is right once a day. Once again we got to see his wis dom, it is right once in the day and then once at night.

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I thought it was interesting that Ben Carson apologized to Donald Trump over a misunderstanding. How often do you hear that on a campaign trail?
From Carson: "I would like to say to him (Trump) that the intention was not to talk to him but about what motivates me,” he said about his religion comment. “If he took that as a personal attack on him, I apologize."

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I thought the new barber renter at my shop was 86.

He replied, "No, I'm only 82."

He is an inspiration to keep right on going ....

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I want to see Sarah Palin take an IQ test. And if she scores below 85, I want her to promise she will go find a cabin somewhere deep deep in Alaska and stay there for the rest of her days and stop entertaining us.

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I got a "Do It Yourself" instructional e-mail from Bernina on making a cover for your dog bed. (I use Bernina software on my industrial embroidery machines)
I thought, "I'm not letting Cooper use my industrial embroidery machine."

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Strange Subject Line on E-Mail:

Labor Day Sale Ends At Midnight

I was thinking, if it didn't end at midnight, it wouldn't truly be a just Labor Day sale.
Actually, in Borger the day part of Labor Day ends at 8:04 PM, so any time after about 9 PM is really Labor Night. So the sale should end by 9 PM, depending on your geographic latitude. Sunset is much earlier in western South Dakota by 43 minutes.

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iOS 9 is an amazing pile of ... Oh, sorry, I can't say that word in my blog. It is terrible. Multitasking doesn't work, Notes new features aren't there, and it is locking up terribly in notes on my iPad. A simple photo transfer fails between my iPhone and iPad. Notes are completely locked up on the iPad. 








2015-08-30

Did You Ask Jesus To Fix Your Frig?

A customer of my wife was getting his hair cut and telling us about the problems he was having with his refrigerator. The door between the freezer and refrigeration sections is stuck open so he manually has to adjust things from time to time.


Then the spouse of the customer says, "Well, we aren't buying any more appliances because Jesus is coming back real soon!"

It took me quite a bit of effort to keep from smiling then laughing.

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Donald Trump isn't in favor of passing tighter gun laws but he is wanting to address mental health issues behind the violent attacks in our society. He wants to make it easier to get insane people off the street and get them help.

I totally agree. My first suggestion is to use this to get Donald Trump locked up in an insane asylum.

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Sometimes I totally get things confused by switching a word to a noun instead of a verb or vice versa. In the following headline I interpretted 'surfaces' as a noun.


I was trying to imagine what the effect or purpose was to use 2000 surfaces to display something.

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Now Sarah Palin wants to be Donald's Secretary of Energy. I can only stand to listen to her for just so long. What I would like is for Sarah Palin to take an IQ test. If she scores below 85, then I would like her to go find a cabin somewhere deep deep in Alaska and stay there for the rest of her days, and stop entertaining us.

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I had a terrible dream last night. Everything in my house was eXtremely organized.

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So there was an idiot wannabe terrorist in Maryland who sent a message on social media to kill all the white people. At least that is what they reported in the headline and they have him in police custody and charged him with a crime. BUT I noticed that he speLLed 'people' with PPL, so maybe he wiLL get off with that technicality. Maybe he didn't like white PVC piping, and he wanted to kill all the white 'PiPeLines' ? It could just be a major plumbing issue ... thoughts don't flow ProPerLy through his brain.



2015-08-29

No Google, Kasich Didn't Say That!!!

I found this interesting thing in Google's display of un-formation of a half-something John Kasich said.


From Google:


Abolish all teachers?!?!?!? No, this is what he really said:


I also found this headline with two negative words:


"Breaking Down" in this article really means "Examining In Detail"

Then I found a huggy time reference in New England from CNN:


"resorts" ?!?!? - that might be a stretch of the reality of the situation.

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In the Trump World, I heard that Sarah Palin was going to interview Donald Trump. "interview"? I laughed for a good ten minutes when I heard those words, just imagining the conversations those two love birds could possibly have. So I guess Palin wants to become the next Barbara Walters. Palin and Trump, the incoherent ineptitude interviewing the incompletely insane. Perhaps they wiLL hug.

And now Trump has attacked Anthony Weiner. I am thinking, "Why?" What good did that do? I am utterly surprised that no one has assassinated Trump yet. 




2015-08-27

Cars, Starring Hugh Laurie, Playing In My Head

My recent dream was a slight modification of the television series House. The characters of House were focused on making difficult automotive repairs. They used medical diagnostic equipment and lingo to repair veRy difficult car problems. It followed the House format of seemingly getting the car fixed only to have it break down again. House then fixed it replacing something minor. 


It was veRy vivid when I first woke up but then I rapidly forgot the details.

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Exciting News: My first new leaf is growing on my 2nd orchid plant. My jungle by the glass back door works its magic.

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My neighbor was working on my car trying to figure out a fuel system problem. But after 17 days I gave up on him and had a tow truck take it to my favorite mechanic's shop. I have been using him for over twenty years. My neighbor used to work in his shop, but they had a parting of ways.

My neighbor was frightened one day by wasps that had recently decided to live in the grill area of the car. Being deathly afraid of them, he grabbed his little boy who had followed him to my house and in the process of running away had dropped the key to the car.

Then it took a few more days of him not working on my car for me to finally give up on him. I had not ound out just yet in the process about the lost key. So he finally told me about it and asked me to let him know how much it would cost to replace the key.

Answer: It was a smart key and so it cost $75.76

I sent him a text message about 12 hours ago and have not heard a reply yet.

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So now Trump's strange news of the moment is about having a woman come on stage to pull his hair to show its attached to his head.

So I would call this the race of the "hair versus the torture us" with more nonsense. I think the torture us is winning.

I am glad that the Walter Cronkite of Latin America is boldly forcing Trump answer policy questions and asking other news people to do the same thing. 

Trump recently made bold claims about how the black vote was going his way. But of course that is total gibberish according to recent poll work. He would lose against Biden, who isn't even running, by a huge margin. 

I think Trump has a god complex. I think he thinks he can simply speak things into existence.

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One of my veRy closest friends from the diner was convicted in a jury trial and was sent to prison for three years. I knew absolutely nothing about this event until it was over, and I am completely devastated. Last night was the first time I tried to eat an evening meal at the diner without her, and it was terribly painful. I would go to see her in the temporary holding place, but I think I would just cry the entire 80 miles there and back. So I think I will stick to letters right now. The owner of the diner gave me a free six pack of beer as a grief present a couple days ago. We are all in a state of shock. I need to bake a cake and take to the diner, as is my custom. I hope her permanent (undecided) location in the Texas prison system isn't too far.


2015-08-26

Dear Roger Ailes

Dear Roger Ailes,


I wish that you would try an experiment with your Fox News Network. I would like you to try stopping your coverage of Donald Trump. Just totally ignore him and see what happens to his cam-pain. No, I didn't spell campaign wrong. When I hear his name or voice I get a headache. Donald is merely running a gigantic reality television show for free using everyone's airtime. It's nonsensical entertainment filled with hate speech. You are enabling a Hitler-type dictator wanna-be. Stop it.

Ernest S B Boston

Why Did The Honey Bee Cross The Road? No, Sorry, Wrong Joke, Which Came First, Bee vs Honey


For decades there have been bugs in software. Now we have put software on bugs.

I am thinking negatively for a second, what could possibly go wrong, with visions of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles going through my head. The intersection where insects meet the Internet.

Buzz 1.0

Honey I Shrunk The Honey Microprocessor

2015-08-23

Cooper Votes

I am having a hellishly busy week where I have contractor fixing water damage, problems with Best Buy sending a bad incompetent joke of a plumber to do a dishwasher install which he screws up leaving water leaks and a broken brand new appliance AND my wife overloads me with work in our printing business. It wasn't completely her fault, she honestly thought she was taking an order for a certain quantity BUT then the customer later clarified it was for FIVE times the amount. 


So I am exhausted yet surprisingly keeping it together.

I wake five mornings ago and tell myself (jokingly) that I need to put Cooper up for adoption because I don't have time to take care of him. [Of course the reality is that he is the thing my daily world revolves around, my source of joy] But then my neXt thought is, "I could kill two birds with one stone by putting my wife up for adoption instead. I wouldn't be eXhausted AND I would have plenty of time for my dog."

So I decide to put it to a vote where the only one voting is the dog.

I am in the kitchen and I turn to him sitting attentively in the livingroom and ask him if we should get rid of Tamie, put her up for adoption. He just looks at me seriously, staring, not blinking. So I rephrase the question slightly but I get the same eXact response which seems to be 'No'.

So I ask him if he would like treats, his dog biscuit and Beggin' Strips. He smiles. A definite Yes.

I go to work and tell this complete tale to my wife who enjoys it immensely. She says, "Do you realize how spoiled rotten that dog is? I made chili last night and cooked ground beef and mixed some in with his dog food aNd he didn't eat it! So then I realized he wanted his usual ingredient, so I spinkled a veRy small amount of beef jerky crumbs on top and he ate it like normal."

2015-08-05

Five Inches of Canine Confusion

Because my Cooper is getting older he is having a harder time climbing up on the bed. So I lowered it down about five inches by removing the metal framework.

Now it is the same height as the couch in the livingroom which he has no problems with getting onto. BUT he is confused about the bed. He doesn't seem to understand what has happened and he won't just jump up on it. He has complained loudly about it. We spent about an hour trying to help him. He did 'crawl' onto it once with Tamie helping him, it was hilarious, but then couldn't figure it out again. He finally gave up and slept on the floor. He even SAW me remove the metal frame.

Old dogs, old tricks.

At least I got to enjoy watching Tamie make running and jumping examples for the dog.

Old women, old tricks.


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If three beers a day wiLL get you to age 110, I am wondering if a 6-pack wiLL let you reach 220.


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I saw a headline: 

Massachusetts Mayor Calls Bobby Jindal The 'Gomer Pyle' of Politics

I thought this was very unfair to Gomer Pyle.


Plus Ted Cruz trying to make bacon with a machine gun. Only Rachel Maddow pointed out that it wasn't a machine gun, it was a semi-automatic.


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I just realized I usually go for several months at a time without ever thinking of Hubert Humphrey.

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At first I thought I had an injury on the knuckle of my right hand. Then I realized it was dried ketchup from supper eleven hours ago. I have no idea how I missed that, I remember wiping my hands off with a napkin, bizarre.

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Fargo!!!! Season 2!!!! October!!!!

I saw that production is currently underway for season 2 of Better Call Saul in Albuquerque.

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Donald Trump found the love of his life at a very early age. It was the first time he looked in a mirror.

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2015-08-02

T Rump, The Lizard King

Former President Jimmy Carter is wrong about the US being an oligarchy. With the Koch brothers spending so much on a vast number of elections it is really an "oil"-igarchy.
Hahahaha, oh, I love my new word.

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Insomnia, Outsomnia

Withinsomnia, Withoutsomnia

For the first time in weeks I didn't wake up at 3 AM.

I woke up at 10:30 PM and stayed awake until 3 AM.

I am not sure I am making progress. 


Yesterday was a very sad day and this is going to be a tough week. We lost a special friend, one of our cosmetology renters, passed away. I enjoyed her very much. I always looked forward to our chats and laughter on Friday afternoons. She cared for so many people in life and was a grand example for all.


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We have received a ridiculous amount of rain this year. We are at about 24 inches so far when we should have received 12 and after about a decade of drought, especially the final three years of it were scorchers, ending about 15 months ago.


With the help of rain barrels I have been able to water my vineyard entirely with rain water. I am about 3/4 finished harvesting my grapes. Its my first harvest with a significant yield on 3 out of 4 plants. I am not sure why the grapes are tiny on the southwest plant, the largest plant.


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The new head of the DEA says that marijuana is less dangerous than heroin. He used the word 'probably'!!!

DUH !!!!!

I hate drugs.


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I will be glad when The Donald is gone. He is such an evil mental imbecile. He has taken megalomania to a whole new level I call gigalomania, which is appropriate as the prefix 'giga' means billion. 


He can't even admit that he has said something that he clearly said, "John McCain is not a war hero." He has this bizarre word algebra where he thinks that saying the opposite statement (sarcastically) four times will negate the original saying. He only said the positive statement because the moderator had instantly chided him AND the audience began to boo him. 


IF he was running for president and doing exactly the same things and saying the exact things WITHOUT the billions of dollars of wealth and previous celebrity status NO ONE would be listening to him. 


His only agenda seems to be building a Mexican wall, bombing ISIS so he can steal their oil and hiring the idiot Palin, the younger female version of his brain for his cabinet. All this while hiring hundreds of immigrants in the past for his empire when he makes all these job creating claims for Americans. He doesn't even seem to be able to properly value his business empire with estimates scattered over a huge range. 


The United States deserves someone far better than this to be the president.


2015-05-15

We Should Rename It Tennes-Three

After I got home from the groc store late at night about 11 PM I sat down on the couch after putting everything away. Then Cooper complained to me, and I suddenly remembered that I had forgot to get his dog biscuits at the store, after I had told him early in the day I would get him some. Luckily there was a box of tiny dog biscuits for Trixie still at our house, so I gave him three of those.


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I have 36 windows open in my Safari web browser. Perhaps I should close a few.

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I learned something new. The state of Tennessee is legally split into three sections: East, Middle and West. They are called Grand Divisions. They are represented by the three stars in the state flag.

When I checked the state quarter for Tennessee they emphasized the distinct music styles of the Grand Divisions and put three musical instruments and three stars. BUT I noticed that the star in the middle position is significantly smaller than the other two.
(I'm sorry, the blogger iPad app didn't pull in this photo of the Tennesse quarter so I will have to do it layer when I get to the office on my PC)

It may be difficult to see the difference in this photo on Facebook, but I used a caliper type device to detect the difference in the original photo.

I put a Tennessee quarter in my flat bed scanner and then used CorelDRAW to measure the longest dimension of the two stars in question. The smaller star is approximately 89% (+/- 1%) as wide as the larger star.

I think they should rename the state Tennes-three.

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Today's Math Lesson: There are 364 holes in my laundry hamper, almost one for each day of the year. So I can look at my empty hamper and imagine a hole-y year. If you include the mouth of the hamper that would be 365.

My friend from Delaware asked me if I counted them all. I told her it was easy because there were 4 sections of 9x10 then the 4 holes for handles.

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RIACH-Herd has a new look: Sunglasses
(RIACH: Reindeer In A Cup Holder)


He has a secret stash of BBQ sauce packets in his bag just for me.

It is hard to see from the camera angle, but he has a beautiful smile.

New Blog for My Abstract Art ... Come Visit

Click HERE for the Art of Ernest S B Boston

These are pieces that I have generated mainly using computer art tools. Enjoy !

Something New:

I am also in the process of linking my poetry blog entries together. This project is only partially finished. A "Poetry LINK" at the bottom of the blog entry points to the next older piece of poetry.


First poem in the series of linked poems ....

Turn Gold Out of the Darkness

Turn Gold Out of the Darkness

Blog Archive

My Art

These are some of my abstract art pieces. They are available as prints, send me a note if you are interested.

Couch Glow

Couch Glow

Gold As Smoke

Gold As Smoke

Flowing Wood

Flowing Wood