My friend Rob Z Tobor of the UK has had difficulties getting a pineapple plant to start, so I have dedicated my youngest plant to him, and named it Rob. I also decided to set aside that portion of dirt (one Folgers Coffee can) as British soil, so we can start an Empire of Rob, or whatever name Rob chooses. So it has an embassy quality to it, as weLL as being a plantation. It is located near my plantation of three pineapple plants. They are aLL currently outside during the months of June through August. The rest of the year they come inside my house near the glass back door. This is similar to how Hong Kong was created I think and there are stiLL several chunks of the British Empire stiLL scattered across the globe.
My wife has a quantity restriction of only three pineapple plants inside the house, so come this September I may have to disguise the smaLLest one, Rob, as something else. Maybe she won't notice for a while. Or perhaps I could get rid of my wife(?).
(haha...hahahha-h-hah)
Maybe I wiLL have a real greenhouse by then.
A picture of Rob the Pineapple Plant
It is about 3 inches tall at the highest point
A picture of my pineapple fruit
It is currently 3 1/4 wide by 3 3/4 tall, not including the green blades
Update: 2012.08.27 - The pineapple plant (on the left rear) that is part of The Empire of Rob has longer leaves, a couple of them are about 8 inches. The pineapple plant on the right-front is from the top of the pineapple I harvested recently.
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15 comments:
Well thank you very much Mr ESB I am an ever so humbled and proud Rob, I will tell all of the pineapple and the Empire of Rob (I am more than happy with the name Empire of Rob).
I was slightly confused when I read about King Kong but I realized the error of my ways. Maybe if you explain to your wife that Rob the pineapple has diplomatic immunity and it is not just a pineapple but an entire Empire she will see it in a different light. And at some time in the future she will be able to deep fry pineapple rings in a nice beer batter and have then with syrup and thick cream.... YUM
Rob: The great irony of this pineapple story is that my wife asked me to pick up a can of pineapple, 16oz, chunks, when I go groc shopping later today. I like your idea of reminding my wife about the diplomatic immunity.
When I go to get license tags for my truck later this month I wiLL ask about getting farm tags instead of regular tags, as I understand there is a difference in price, the farm tags being cheaper with the logic that the typical farm truck is "consuming" less highway resources, while continuing to pay road tax embedded in the price of fuel. If that fails maybe I wiLL ask for British diplomatic tags instead.
Here in the UK we have Red diesel which is cheaper than regular diesel but can not be used on the highway ( public roads. Fuel in the UK is about £1:35 a litre at present so £6.14 a gallon or 9.50165 U.S. dollars a gallon....
But in the Empire of Rob there are no roads as yet so no road tax or fuel duty.... It is true to say though that a fair chunk of the income is from pineapples.
Esby, getting rid of the wife, there is no amount of ha ha ha's to save your butt on that one, just tell her there was a twin type situation and you had to do surgery to separate them.
Hmm, I commented and got kicked off.
fmcgmccllc: Are you sure you got kicked off? I was away for awhile downtown and I just now did the comment approval step ....
fmcgmccllc: Siamese Twin Pineapples! I did have one of them start growing from the side instead of directly from the eXisting leaves of the crown. But the crown part didn't work and the side growth did. The mystery of the pineapple plant ....
I've never seen a pineapple tree, let alone one in disguise. I'm intrigued.
Oh wow that's brilliant! It looks like they're coming on very nicely :D I wonder if Rob will taste good when he's done :P
Marianne: The vast majority of people that I meet think thatineapples grow on trees, but I don't think it is even close to being a tree. I think people are confused by the words "pine" and "apple" - both 'tree' words - combined together making something that isn't a tree, and the shape of a pineapple resembling a pine cone doesn't help either.
Aysh: I clearly laughed too long at your "if Rob will taste good when he's done" - we are hoping that our homegrown Texas pineapple wiLL taste good. I am thinking it could possibly another month before it is done at the earliest. But it spent several months indoors, so I don't know it wiLL take a lot longer, because it currently has only a smaLL volume compared to the dimenions of a groc store sized pineapple. I just have no eXperience with this process yet of creating a fruit.
well for someone with no experience, you've done a really good job! they can only get better with practice :)
Aysh: (blushing, responds childishingly cute) *tank que*, ah, you're a sweetie.
We grow a few pineapples. It's a sub tropical type of climate here but they still take a long time to grow. anything from 18 months to 2 years. How long do yours take to grow Esbboston?
Like most home grown things there is nothing to compare with the sweetness of a home grown pineapple...mmmm
Julie: It probably takes mine slightly longer than yours because mine get a less sunshine per day than the typical pineapple plant. I've never known anyone who grows pineapples, you're the first! I am getting my first real batch of grapes from two out of four vines, my father would have been proud, as he was a jelly maker. He picked alot of wild fruit, and gave his jelly away to lots of folks. My newest two year old grape vine is coming along nicely and I'm trying to get new posts cemented in the ground as soon as it stops raining, a rare problem for us!
I can see how one could become a mad power hungry monomaniacal ruler watching ones empire slowly grow.
Power
POWER I need more Power
No only kidding Mr ESB ....Thanks for the Pic it looks WELL COOL.
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