Philososophy

My friend used the word 'philosophy' yesterday in a conversation. All of our conversations eventually spin horribly out of control into a jumbled pile slash mess of The hilarity and The goofy. In mock seriousness she said that I never let her express her philososophies. In mock anger I replied that I don't mind letting her express her philosososophies.

Then we had a discussion of just how many extra 'so' to include in the middle of The word philosophy and which 'so' syllable should be accented. I mentioned that in the future when she hears a public speaker use The word 'philosophy' she should immediately stand up in the meeting and ask them, "did you mean 'filled with sausages in me' or (if Islamic) 'filled with salami' ?" and then listen to see if the confused person can continue to properly pronounce The word 'philosophy'. She said she would probably get kicked out of the meeting. We giggled our good-byes, ended our run of pun fun, and I wandered away out into the mid day sun.

But this morning I suddenly see the need to have a prepared philosophy of flying sauces. This will come in handy if we are invaded by space aliens. For instance, if you find yourself talking to a space alien while admiring his space craft and you feel the need to attack preemptively, just ask him,  "Do you have a philosophy of the use of flying sauces as weapons?"

The confused space alien will then ask, "Do you mean 'flying saucers' ?"

At this point you can whip out your hidden jug of Molotov Cocktail Sauce that you always carry just for these types of emergencies. In a Randy Quaid Independence Day way you and your glass half gallon of sauce may be the only thing that saves mankind from certain doom.