OriON is ON

Bubba,

grab your brand spankin' new tennis ball

and let's head outside,

there's plenty of moonlight demanding

we must play

and make some dust fly

in the dark,

Go, Dog, Go !

Look!

SomeONe has turned ON OriON

as well, 

we'll make moON and star shadows tONight.

Twinkle, OriON, Twinkle !

Let the game of Paw Ball begin!

The crowd roars!

( invisible  vicious  canine  vizinho 

howls  in  the  vicinity 

from  behind  beyond  the  fence )

Glow, moON, Glow !


Poetry LINK: the next poem in my blog ...

Mercy Full

'merciful' is sneaky

in a good way

as one word

for it sounds

like two words,

two good words combined synergistically

to make a single great calling

of promise and hope and bounty,

overcoming stark emptiness

and void dark,

nestled in comfort and warmth,

held close and protected.

Poetry LINK: the next poem in my blog ...

A Spoon of One - Statistics on an Empty Stomach

Real Life Statistics Problem: I put one jalapeno pepper cut up in chunks in my chili batch. If there are X number of tablespoons of chili in the finished pot, how many pieces of pepper should there be in order to have a 95% probability that there will be at least one pepper piece in each tablespoon? (The total amount of pepper is constant - only the chunk size changes)

The next day I performed two experiments, the first with jalapeno peppers, then red bell peppers, with the same batch of gumbo, figuring it was just as good as chili for my inquiring mind and semi-hungry stomach.

I had no idea how many tablespoons there should be in the batch - didn't care to calculate (I was hungry), so I just guessed at 24 pieces of jalapeno. This was too few as there wound up being 34 tablespoons of gumbo. (Put the gumbo back in the pan.)

Next, I tried 50 pieces of red bell pepper, easily distinguishable from the other ingredients. This time there were fewer tablespoons of gumbo, 30, probably due to some spillage and evaporation of cooking, and thicker soup allowed for a higher piling of contents in the spoon. This time there were 7 spoons out of 30 that had no pieces of red bell pepper; 23% Zero Events.

So 50 pieces of pepper with 30 spoons failed to achieve the original goal of 95% of the spoons having at least one of the desired pepper of the current experiment phase. (Put the gumbo back in the pan again)

When I ate the gumbo I performed one more count. This time there were only 23 tablespoons of gumbo (evaporation, wolves, gremlins, hunger?). There were 4 Zero Events, so I achieved 83% of the spoons having at least one red bell pepper. Sadly though, there was a DAMET (Disappearance Amelia Mary Earhart Type) of 4 out of the 50 pieces of Red Bell Pepper chunks during the ensuing savage soup slurping and sloshing.

Mmmmm...athe..mmmm...atics

How Do You Become An Exobiologist? Follow My Five Step Plan

First, you have to find an "obi"


Second, you have to decide if you want to study it.


Third, If you study "obi", then you automatically become an "obiologist"


Fourth, When you decide to stop being an obiologist, you become an "exobiologist" if you truly stop.


Fifth (optional), If you resume after stopping, you are now an "exexobiologist"

Update 2011.02.27 - I noticed that I messed up the title, it reaaallly only takes four steps not five to get to the ex stage, it's five steps to the exex. Well, no sense changing it now, we wouldn't want people to think it's that easy to become an exobiologist.

Tam Gym Slim

Tam gym slim new view, 

him too, soup-er fan taste-ic, 

fun run buns-of-steel, less ate, 

way to feel, ain't it great? 

Yes, very yes! 

Live longerer and prosperer, 

livelyerer and funnyerer.

You too can join us two 

and be more loinless 

for not much coinless 

and much more happyness. 

Smile. 

Soup is on, pounds are off, 

its really been quite easy, 

just avoid the old things 

too cheesy, sweet or greasy. 

Big smile.


Poetry LINK: the next poem in my blog ...

99 Things To Debottleneck On My Wall

I saw this list of events on a blog. You are supposed to copy and paste to your own blog and bold everything you’ve done.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain (It was called 'Lookout Mountain', so Yes!)
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child (kind of, my own version of adoption)
16. Had food poisoning (not sure)
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty (saw it – better yet, I went to the top of the World Trade Center in 1994)
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked (I had to make it home for a wedding of a good friend and I owned no vehicle my freshman year in college)
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb (Had a lamb)
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse (?)
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise (In New Orleans on the Mississippi River with my children – and NO wife!!!)
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community (actually went to a church conference once where there were Amish in attendance. That's how I used to roll, a long time ago, "semi-Amish")
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing (does shale or gravel count? Then yes)
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance – but only 4 blocks, they decided I didn't need to go to the hospital
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class (that's how I got my girlfriend from Hawaii - karate)
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy (of someone else)
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job (***More than once!***)
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone 
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (helped my grandmother ONCE with a chicken)
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury (I tried really hard!)
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake (Only drove by it)
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee (of course, this means I have also killed a bee)

HELP - My New Portuguese Version of My Blog Is Invisible To Google Search

I have started the process of translating some of my writings into (Brazilian) Portuguese in a separate blog using blogger, but so far Google has not seemed to pick it up with their search engine.

So if you know anyone, or you are someone, who can proofread the articles I post in the Portuguese blog and compare them to the same English versions in this blog, I would appreciate being notified by comments (on the Portuguese blog). Although I have been working on Portuguese for a long time, I never feel close to being fluent!

My Portuguese blog: http://esbbostoportuguese.blogspot.com/

The Edge of No Knowledge

Knowledge is 

knowing where the edge 

of your know and no-know is, 

and knowing not to step over that 

inverted L shaped edge 

of the know cLiFF, that big iF 

that separates suddenly, 

to experience the free fall 

into no-know land, 

landing with a splat thud-denly, 

crumpled strain pain 

flowing blood-enly 

and still not knowing, 

shakes sore knotted head, 

"why did that just happen?", 

staring back upwardly 

at the distinct 

distant 

NO ledge.

POETRY LINK: the next poem in my blog ...

Being Married To Two Thirds of The Dixie Chicks Is A Dream Job

[ I finally decided to publish this after waiting almost two years ]

February 11th, 2008

I had the strangest, most elaborate dream of my entire life last night. I was living with 2 out of 3 of The Dixie Chicks, in the same house, a giant house and there were tons of children and several episodes in the dream.

There were even mad mother-in-laws, crude robotic machines that swept the floors, and failed attempts at trying to take a shower (it was always filled). None of the children were mine and practically all of them didn't like me.

The third Dixie Chick (the banjo player) actually lived in the same house, but I didn't have a marriage relationship with her like I did the other two. I don't even know the names of the Dixie Chicks! I know that in real life the lead singer is from Lubbock, Texas, where the dream took place.

There were picture albums. We spent time looking at photo albums together.

The entire dream took place inside or near the house EXCEPT there was an accompanying segment of the dream where I parked my car (the exact Lincoln Town car I have in real life) in an empty lot instead of leaving it in the street, near a convenience store. The street was a wide multi-lane east-west passageway in Lubbock, south of the loop.

Someone contacted me about my car, and I was warned that I had 24 hours to get my car or it would be towed away. But when I got there in plenty of time there were several vehicles and people fixing to tow my car. I had an argument with them but then I think I was recognized as "The Dixie Chick Guy" and they let me have my car for $385.

I had also lost my personal organizer in the dream, and was frustrated about that. I was married to the Dixie Chick who is the main singer and also the one who plays the fiddle. Their mothers looked like aged versions of them in my dream.

The passageways in part of the house were very narrow.

What prompted this dream? I had watched a small portion of one music video 'Cowboy Take Me Away' as I was flipping channels. Obviously I am their cowboy of choice. Later when I sent this dream recording to my second pen pal in Washington, there was a little bit more that I had not sent to my first pen pal in Texas:

No one in the house smoked. There was a separate office area under a large patio area where the business people worked and they all smoked, and there was falling water in several places and devices to keep the place cool. The people in the office area all liked me.

There was one time where I kissed the lead singer on the cheek because she was undergoing some medical procedure, and headed to the doctor's office. She looked rather pale.

Oh, I almost forgot, there were some free fiddle lessons as well.

So if they ever decide to write a song called: "Robotic Cowboy Sweep Me Off My Feet", I already have a music video idea for them.

Off to make breakfast in the real world....

Four Thirds In Love ..OR.. We've Bean Two-gether Two Long !!!

We now have absolute proof that we needed to have "bean" together for our 27 years of marriage. My wife came home to make her soup & was experimenting a little & telling me about it from the kitchen. So I went to show her that I still had slightly more than a 1/2 can of Ranch Style Beans left from my experiment ..... she had opened up her own can & had used the exact same amount!

I wrote a new expression based on an old one: instead of us being "Like two peas in a pod", we are "Like two 2/3's cans of leftover Ranch Style Beans in a Zip-Loc bag"

Soup. Coffee. Window.

Soup. What I 

really want at this moment is soup,

the last of the leftover chili with large pieces of onion, white, and eighth inch chunked peppers, jalapeno for their dark green and red bell peppers, same size, a festive look, 

and 

fresh hot coffee with creamer, brown, dark tan, and white sugar swirled 

and 

then sit by my picture window looking out 

and 

east on a bright clear cold winter, 

my tree barren of leaves with branches lightly white frosted 

but holding firm a deep promise of soon green soon spring, 

unimaginable against a sub zero C breeze, 

the green of my peppers hidden now deep now 

within me. Soup.

POETRY LINK: the next poem in my blog ...

Be Stenciled Or Be Penciled

This picture started from an experiment with circles, using paper, pen or pencil and my latest toy back then, a stencil of circles, in black and white. Each ~horizontal row is made from very-close-to-the-same size circle with the row it below using a slightly smaller circle. I tried to make the circles just barely touch to the same degree. This 8x8 curved trapezoidal shape was a pleasant surprise. I made several other designs using the this technique, but I have only scanned this one into the computer so far, and then took it from simple monochrome circles to a textured 3-D like surface.

I checked the definition for trapezoid, and it requires a pair of parallel sides. A similar new vocab word (for me, not from me) today is the word "trapezium", which is a four sided irregular quadrilateral with no sides being parallel, all sides being different lengths. But my newly minted adjective of trapeziumial appears to be new with no matches in a Google search. It is easier to pronounce if you put the accent on the "um".

So this is my warped geometrical answer to the expression, "Be there or be square", - "Be stenciled or be penciled".

Moo Ham Med & Zombies

I was extremely curious as to why yesterday's attempt on the life of the Danish cartoonist involved an ax. My research found that an Indian, Haji Yaqoob Qureishi, a minister in the Uttar Pradesh state government, announced in Feb 2006 a cash reward of about US$11 million for anyone who beheads "the Danish cartoonist" who caricatured Mohammad.

The Cartoonist Kurt Westergaard

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurt_Westergaard

The Controversy

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jyllands-Posten_Muhammad_cartoons_controversy

The Mohammed cartoon controversy revolves around the Islamic prohibition against visual depictions of their prophet. Since he died about 1400 years ago he is most likely reduced to bones by now, so I guess this would make Halloween costumes of a human skeleton forbidden?

This would at least make it so that zombie costumes, my understanding relatively recently dead people, no where near the 1400 year mark, shouldn't be Isla-co-mic-ally offensive to confuse them as being depictions of "M" (oh, there I go self censoring myself out of fear of retribution of ax wielding maniac greedy assassins... as long as they don't disrupt the flow of and generation of really cool Lego sets, I'll be happy, it'll be worth it all. "Den-mark, Den-mark, Den-mark ...."

Now I am getting kind of scared thinking of the ~400 cartoons that I have made to varying degrees of completion. Luckily most of them make fun of stupid people and stupid animals. I guess I'll have to be a lil more cautious about answering the front door....