"What suns!" said Watson and The Invisible Bisons

I am sitting on the couch reading a wikipedia article about author Mickey Spillane. Cooper wants to sit beside me, so I move a pillow out of his way. When I look back at the screen of my iPad it has changed to the Russian version, Мікі Спіллейн. I think, there must be sum+thin special goin' on (and off).

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Today I went buffalo hunting.

From outerspace.

I know where buffalo live inside Amarillo, so I used Google Earth to search for them.

I was not successful.

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I have moved on to 6.1 sigma.

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Cooper slipped on something coming in the back door, and in his scramble to regain his footing his left front claws landed on top of my bare right foot, big ouch! No pineapple plants were seriously injured in the ruckus, just slightly tilted.

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New Toys: DB'ing in Java with NetBeans

(no, that has nothing to do with grinding coffee beans or brewing a cup.)

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I wrote something here but then erased it. Sorry. Maybe it wiLL return in an altered acceptable formation. ActuaLLy I didn't erase it, I cut it then pasted it somewhere else. So that word 'erased' in the first sentence is wrong but now I can't erase that erased without erasing aLL this. I should quit and make soup ... At least I removed the eXtra s from the word ssomewhere, you can find it somewhere else earlier in this status.

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(From two days ago)

I just woke up a few minutes ago after falling asleep on the couch. I yelled reaLLy loud because I wasn't eXpecting Cooper to be standing there with his nose almost touching mine! My loud burst of noise didn't seem to phase him and I think he actuaLLy smiled. I think he was afraid of the thunder outside .... I am off to see if it actuaLLy rained. Silly dog.

No.

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(From three days ago)

After trying to not watch "Chopped" ...(the Food Channel)... ...(against my wiLL)... I am headed to the kitchen to make chili cheese hot dogs ...

Ha! - A new episode started just as I was getting my stuff out of the frig, and what were they cooking on Chopped? Hot Dogs! Firemen cooking hot dogs ...

Next round ... Now they are cooking bison! I am jealous ....

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I slightly modified this reaLLy good joke:

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: "Watson, look up at the sky, and tell me what you see."

Watson replied: "I see millions and millions of stars."

Holmes said: "And what do you deduce from that?"

Watson replied: "Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life. AND that life might have advanced enough so that its creatures go camping and they might be looking back at us asking the same questions!!!"

And Holmes said: "No, Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent."

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My wife was teLLing me a story from her business.

My response was, "baby, we belong in a world that must be strong, that's what dreams are made of." She responded with some short positive agreement, not realizing that I had given her a Van Halen lyric.

Do Not Use

If you would like my recommendation based on my dealings with a company, do NOT use Leal's Asphalt Repair of Amarillo TX.

Things To Do On A Vacation to Albuquerque NM

Tour all the filming sites for the teleBision series Breaking Bad.

Buy a Make Your Own Blue Meth Kit at a convenience store.

Join the search for comedic actor Andy Kaufmann in hiding, who most likely died 29 years ago. (Its an Elvis conspiracy theory kinda thing.)

Eat!!!

Explore the mystery of why the first R was dropped from the original speLLing 'Alburquerque'. Notice the wonderful symmetry of the repeated 'rque', which could easily be pronounced 'ark', which could lead to a whole new combined word of "Al buh ark ark", which reaLLy sounds more like how Cooper might pronounce it.

Go to Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Learn that Albuquerque means White+Oak in Spanish, and then begin to only use the word 'Whiteoak' and correct people AND road signs with stencils and spray paint when they try to say the Albu word. Make fun of anyone who tries to teLL you the name is derived from the Arabic word for The Plum.

Drink!!!

Visit the hospital to view new borns, to see New New Mexicans.

Visit the zoo to view African antelope, to see gnu New Mexicans. (Hahahahaha - I thought of you, Rob, when I wrote this pair.)

Discover that there is a job opening for a high school chemistry teacher and apply. (Yes, I accidentaLLy discovered this last week while looking for chemist jobs in New Mexico)

Learn to breathe at 10,300 ft elevation. Then make bragging comments like, "This isn't even as high as La Paz Bolivia" and demand coca leaves for elevation sickness relief. (Oh, wait, this is the elevation for nearby Sandia Peak. Albuquerque is about half that elevation at 5300)

Watch your kids play mud volleyball.

Be merry!!

Try to meet at least one person from each of Albuquerque's 46 zip codes. Put them on your Christmas card list.

When people ask, teLL them your name is Walter White or Jesse Pinkman or better yet, mix those first and last names.

Reenact the 1862 Civil War battle of Albuquerque, which involves retreating to Texas, which fits perfectly into my plans for going home.

A Dragon and Water and ... Cocoa

I just realized somethinkg: If two people co-composed (music), then that is veRy close to posing as cocoa. "Cocoa, I'm Posed" It could also mean if you had a photographer named Cocoa, you could be teLLing her that you are ready to be shot.

I blame this thought on the piece of French glacier I am drinking. I have not drank a French glacier in quite a while. I fixed several things today, but not eveRything. The last thing was too dan ger ous and lacked instructions and labeling.

I have made some headway on my Perl programming for playing cryptograms.

Yesterday was a good day. I made my friend Jesus a German Chocolate Cake for his birthday. I was a "bit" late, as his birthday was several weeks ago. WeLL, I also baked him a loaf of bread that he got much closer to his birthday. I think I fixed my truck yesterday, going to the mechanic's shop to have them verify the weLLness of something tomorrow.

While groc shopping today I realized that the candy named Hot Tamales is a veRy weLL defined product, you know eXactly what you are getting. But if someone comes out with Not Tamales, then that would be quite a product, it could be anything eXcept tamales. You open it up, "A Dragon!!!", you open it up again, "Water!!!" - I didn't imagine opening it up a third time, I wiLL leave that up to you. It could even be ONE single tamale, as that would not be a tamales plural.

I understand that it is veRy close to Cooper's birthday. He was born eXactly (Private NUMBER Goes Here) weeks before my niece's son 8 years ago. But I just found out about the FWTD (five week time delta) a few days ago. He enjoyed his cheeseburger this evening. I cut it up into 8 pie shaped pieces, repositioned it like a crown, then doused it with dry dog food.

I am veRy disappointed with our lack of spring time and its effect on my grapevines. There are veRy few leaves. No sign of any praying mantis yet.

The fourth word of the blog post "somethinkg" was not a typo.

I recently changed my blog profile after nearly six years. It used to begin saying something about my main goal is to try to be the nicest person in the universe. I felt the was too much pressure. I have changed it to say 3rd nicest person in the universe.