When I discover that people are or want to be like me, I teLL them, "Ah, its a CURSE." And when they ask for more details, I say, "see, yoU aRe aS E." where E is Ernest.
I am busy writing lyrics for "Where Are You Rainstorm?" to the tune "Where Are You Christmas?" from the movie 'How The Grinch Stole Christmas'. But my screenplay is titled 'How The Grinch Stole Spring'.
Meanwhile, about a fourth of Fritch TX burns down from a wildfire about a dozen miles west of me.
I get a call from my wife.
"Can you come and get me?"
(Me): "Where are you at?" (Confused)
"I am at work, too." (Same building, well, almost the same building)
Laughter on her end of the communication channel.
Oh, the semi-elderly.
I hang up and start singing our friend Angela's song, "Gonna Make Me Lose My Mind"
I post this in Facebook: I think I am getting new socks today. Yea!
After posting this status two of my young female friends who work at our building argue in the comments about which one of them gets to deliver the package to my office. Several interesting comments comparing their beauty and intelligence. They are sisters. In the end I let each of them deliver the package while the other one isn't there.
It greatly delays me actually getting to wear the socks, but I have plenty of toe socks for my Vibrams.
Your refrigerator can appear magical at 3:40 AM.
I open the door and when I look down there appears to be a yogurt container floating in mid-air.
Then I realize it is on a clear glass plate that is really a lid for a casserole dish upside down.
The lid is sticking way out over the shelf front more than halfway. It is being held in place cantilevered by a container of uncooked hashbrown potatoes.
At this point I stop investigating The Magic Phenomenon and close the door and I supress the thought of wondering how aLL those things got in those positions.
All this was possible because I open a disturbing e-mail at 2:00 AM letting me know how incompetent the Epson people are at handling shipments, now multiple instances of "overnight" deliveries taking a week or not even arriving at aLL, and now my story with Epson warranty service gets longer and stranger. I am thinking my next printer will be a Canon, but a "cannon" would be nice about now, too.
I want an IGNORE ALL GAME INVITATIONS option in Facebook.