My 7th Collection of 100 Headlines, Status and Moments in Rhyme from MySpace, Facebook and Twitter
Other Collections of 100: 1-100 101-200 201-300 301-400 401-500 501-600
700: The earth is leaking the transformed chemicals of things that died long ago killing the things of today causing a shortage of crawfish and shrimp ettouffee in my future. Or at least it results in a more expensive bowl of bayou Cajun Creole goodness ;^(
698: My new toy. I am my own Briggs and my own Stratton. I am the horse of my power. I am the spark plug of my mow.
697: I found a new printer for my computer. The minimum font size is a bit much though. Adds a whole new meaning to the word "Inkjet". Splat.
http://www.designboom.com/weblog/cat/8/view/10048/facade-printer.html
696: Do you ever have a distinct eerie feeling that someone has moved your ceiling fan in the middle of the night? (Right, that's never happened to me either)
695: Something cute I heard from a child: "These Cheerios are different. They seem fluffier. And by that I mean they're better"
694: Ernest S B Boston just joined the [Facebook] group "This Group Doesn't Exist In Facebook"
693: The noisy beaver outside with 2-cycle semi-unmuffled motor woke me. So I decided to calm my nap lack angst with a cookie. Inside the package was a special note from the Keebler elf. I now know his first name: 'Ernie' The message told me the 3 secret ingredients to their cookies: Care, Passion, and Elfin ingenuity
692: I am not sure what is outside. It is sounds like either a Dremel tool on steroids, someone getting their teeth cleaned with a chainsaw, or a harmonica player who accidentally swallowed his instrument but is determined to keep playing. Ear plug time.
691: Someone in Russia loves me
690: I think I found my cell phone even though I wasn't looking for it. It's 8:00 AM. The Mon-Sat morning alarm goes off. My Samsung sang. It is buried in the couch with an extra blanket on top. It is saying rescue me. I have coffee. I ignore it. I am warm far away. Did I mention that 'I have coffee' ? Do I look like a St. Bernard? (Don't answer that last one)
689: LOL - while reviewing the history of the edit process for the article "Immigration to the United States" in wikipedia, I came across an interesting name for a user ID: "Can't sleep, clown will eat me"
688: Geek Disk-overy: Using the glow of your laptop computer screen to read a book in bed
(Actually it wasn't a totally new disk-overy, I have used it as a flashlight several times, wandering the hallways helping my feet avoid dog chew bones and sharp splintery jagged fragments of dog chew bones.)
687: Just in the process of determining my level of ick and sick at the wrong time of the day .... (5 AM)
686: Earth Day is nice, Earth Year is better.
685: Outside my window and room are brown low down mushy mushrooms in a row in the wet breeze by the trees popped out of the ground just found by a surprised wife in the grass as she passes on her quick several block hop to her shop. No time for us to stop and smell the fungus, hair and flair to do in a new do for quite a few.
684: Here is something "automatically" funny. I am in an application doing semi-random reading where the system is supposedly picking similar blogs for me based on my recent reading activity. [Remember: I am not making any choices] The system responds: "The blog you were looking for is not available" so I push the back button and try again. It works this time. I want a smarter "Next" button.
683: Than k y ou Fac ebo ok fo r imp roving thin gs a gain
682: Disgusted - just found out that the evil totally worthless tobacco industry has started marketing candy like smokeless tobacco products in a variety of flavors with an easily concealable form of a nicotine delivery system, not a smoking cessation device. Poisonous savory ploy without the smoky whirl to poison us with flavor for every boy and girl. A wolf in Camel's clothing.
681: I learned today that when the Department of Defense was created they were originally called the "enemy". The original name of the department under the National Security Act of 1947 was the "National Military Establishment" or NME, which people began pronouncing "enemy". It took them slightly more than 2 years to be renamed to the DoD.
680: Yea!!! I now have "free" over-the- air HD TV from an antenna; good-bye di$h.
679: I am deeply saddened, yet giggling tremendously, at a loss for the right words to express my silly angst after coming across an entry in wikipedia for a pinball machine named 'Attila the Hun' that was produced in 1984. Oh, George Orwell, you were slightly wrong about a few things.
If you want to find this article, just keep hitting the random article button, IT will eventuALLy find yoU.
678: I want to try creating a new movie script out of two old movies ... say ... 'The Blind Side' 2009 and ... hmm ... 'Pollyanna', the 1960 Disney production with Hayley Mills, not to be confused with the 1993 violent movie 'Blind Side' and the 1920 silent version of 'Pollyanna' with Mary Pickford. [{Hayley will be 64 two ...days from now, and Mary would have been 118 years old eight days ago}]
677: A wet day to weather watch drips and drops and downpours with the dog by the window, wrapped warm on the right side, the inside, of the glass. Sofa, so good.... until the UPS truck rumbled by, waking the four footer, rousing him to a ruffing state.
676: Just recently learned about the ENS - Enteric Nervous System – fascinating!
675: I wonder if zombiez ever attempt "Fight To The Life" contests?
674: match.com emails are arriving in my wife's inbox - should I be worried?!?!?
673: Off to determine which end of the spectrum of 'hunter-gatherer' I am closer to, with an inverted metallic wired cage with wheels complete with coffee cup holder near the handle and squeaky wobbly wheels. Got milk? No, that's the main purpose of this epic journey away from the quiet comfort of this pillow and gentle ele...ctric breeze in the dark minus the Samsung glow.
672: Awww... fluffy socks!!!
671: So....Ernest. Are you an English teacher? [ a question from a new friend ]
670: "Ununseptium" - that is the temporary name for the new element recently created with atomic number 117. HOLD IT - isn't that a double negative - couldn't it just be "septium"?
669: Note: I sent one message by phone as a Facebook status update because my normal access to Facebook was broken by their malfunctioning system. BUT then A&TT and or Facebook conspired against me, broke it up into three pieces and added its own garbage (so read them in the opposite order A->B->C)
(C) ##ß##position as me, that is my lame excuse for momentarily visiting MySpace
(B) ##ß##ve absolutely no idea if this is going to actually appear anywhere but if it does I will be the last person to know unless of coarse you are in the same
(A) ##ß##If you can read this then I am in a strange predicament where I can update my FaBo status remotely but can't access the system in a normal manner so I ha
668: I don't think the dog has quite figured out I am playing a new game with him, he is still doing the old one. OW!!! He just whacked me with a hippopotamus.
667: My heart goes out to millions of Polish people in sorrow today at the loss of their leader and so many more in a single event.
666: I saw the left side of a man's black bra flapping in the wind at 40 mph on 10th Street. [-This isn't as bad as it sounds. A 'bra' is a protective device worn on the front of (typically) sports cars to protect them from flying debris, rocks, etc and 40 mph is the speed limit on that stretch of road-]
665: Today's Dumb Joke (- and a Science one too!) : Did you know a 'phone' is very acidic? It is a pH of one.
664: I don't live near a real airport. But most days at 6 AM and PM there is a noise akin to WWII era prop plane(s) from one particular too near neighbor, at the vehicular virtual aural airport, as he winds the giant rubber band in that tiny dark foreign car and takes off to work. At a muffler shop. Silence is aureate-al.
663: The very middle of middle c is this ":" [vertically]
662: G Ng Ing Ring Pring ... Spring!
661: If 'stuck' is the past tense of 'stick', what is a 'candlestuck', and should I fear it?
660: From the wikipedia article about the Hehe people of Tanzania: "Two male witnesses were thought sufficient for most 'normal' cases while it was thought that three to five were necessary with female witnesses."
659: I am feeing really blue. Literally. On my retina. The power switch to my Gateway computer is an extremely intense blue light that blasts my eyes. It is normally covered by a piece of paper. But scooting it back into place would require my 2 feet to walk 5 feet so I sit in an awkward position instead. That accurately describes my too early paining, I mean morning, head. Need more coffee bean, less laser beam.
658: I saw that CNN was reporting about a letter and other documents that a certain organization sent to XX state governors demanding their immediate resignation. CNN mentioned no threats were involved. Yet the FBI and the Department of Homeland Security got involved. What I really want to know is A) Why CNN thought this was a news story and helped legitimize their cause and B) why the Feds are spending money investigating.... Free Speech?
657: I wanted to tell you that I formulated a mathematical conjecture about all current mathematical conjectures but then I would have to explain the what and why of mathematical conjectures so I decided to (almost) keep it to myself.
656: Today I am reading "me" in Swedish. I have never studied Swedish or ever plan to do so, but today I noticed that someone had translated my entire blog to Swedish with a Google translate function. En Nobelpriset i litteratur skulle kunna vara i min framtid!
655: My most recent discovery: Instant Tofu Miso Soup - just add water PLUS precooked chicken and diced jalapeno. Available locally at United Supermarket ...Mmmm... seaweed! (Kikkoman)
654: This is the difference between my wife and myself while trying to interpret the dog's lack of action and passive mild apparent disobedience followed by a sudden surge of timely compliance. A-He wants to be king? B-He was just being polite? - we say simultaneously. I wonder if similar discussions occurred on the streets of Paris during the French Revolution in regards to their unruly ruthless regal ruler.
653: Don't believe yellow lies. I saw an advertisement for a "better" TV that has a yellow dot besides the normal RGB - Red Green Blue - trio that has powered color TV and computer monitors for decades. Notice that they are demonstrating for you the wonderful new fabulous Yellow on a your "old" TV that has no yellow dots.
652: I am working on new lyrics for the tune Popeye The Sailor Man: "I'm Tamie The Mighty Termite Terminator" (There really aren't termites in my house – my spouse has an overactive imagination, lack of entomo-”logical” education and a big fly swatter. It was entertaining though, watching her climb on the couch in hot pursuit of a mystery bug.)
651: I hear a moaning at the back door; alas, a puppie-dog on the wrong side of the glass; outside it is a lightly wet, slightly wet mornin'. And cold. And windy. And noisy. Time to embark on a journey to find red tomato plants for the green house part of my beige house.
650: Fun ny fun child ren
649: I am tired, mainly tired of today's version of nonsense. (Maybe its just the wind?) ((Maybe its just all the crazy drivers out today?)) (((Maybe its the bands of roving viscous coyotes?))) ((((Maybe its cause I feel like I am one of them?)))) [Ooops, that's 'Crazy Driver' - not 'Roving V. Coyote']
648: Today's Piece of Wikipedia Numerical Nonsense: "Starcz [start͡ʂ] is a village in the administrative district of Gmina Lutocin, within Żuromin County, Masovian Voivodeship, in east-central Poland.[1] It lies approximately 14 kilometres (9 mi) west of Żuromin and 126 km (78 mi) north-west of Warsaw. The village has a population of 10." 10 ?? Village ??? Without even looking, I am more inclined to believe its just a couple of houses in the middle of nowhere Poland.
647: Rework of Number 67: After the demolition crew blew up the old candy factory, the factory workers stood around in a pessimistic mood as the mist of PEZ candy hung flung in the air as pulverized mint and cement peppered the pavement and assaulted their sense of swell.
646: After watching Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid mess up his own vote twice on the same thing, I think one of the qualifications for being a United States Senator should be to understand the difference between the word "Yes" and "No", in both written and audible forms. Perhaps sobriety tests as well for each time they enter the Senate chamber.
645: You would think by now I would be better at keeping jalapeno pepper chemicals off my hands ... and here is the crucial part: so it wouldn't get in my eyes! ... but sadly, tearfully, you would have thought wrong. (I'm the one with tears, not you) Soup turned out okay. The spouse liked it. She thinks I have done a good job recreating an old recipe called "Uncle Ern's World Famous Soup", only this one has pork.
644: Question: How many people out there know someone who has milked a goat in the last 48 hours? Sadly, I am one of them. No no no! Not a milker of goats, I'm someone who KNOWS someone who has milked a goat. I told my wife to tell that person, well, when the Health Scare Bill ruins the country and the Arabs take over running the place, she'll fit in just fine. How about camels?
(I received a complaint about this one from my aunt who noted the fine quality health benefits of goats milk, so I had to respond because I was secretly maing fun of two of my in-laws, not really goats in general)
We have had alot of fun over the years making light of the goats and goat herd of the local rancher who shall remain anonymous unless someone reads this and reveals who I am talking about. A certain nearby city council has worked rather hard to try to eliminate the herd but it is still in existence. An episode in that legal nearly catastrophic battle can be found in the real life adventure story "Choking and Laughter: Key Ingredients to a Great Evening Meal"
We love our old goat rancher very much and love to tease him about his herd, as well as other things, lots of things. Although lovable and hug-able, he makes himself an easy target.
643: As I let my dog out the back door, I 'gently' pushed one of the winged sleepy neighbors back outside using my cellphone as a transport-transput device, then gave instructions to the curious hound, who had wondered what I had found, "Its a wasp, make sure you eat it"
642: Youth in Asia
641: The really nice part of our legal system is that it is cast in stone that very few things are cast in stone.
640: I have noticed in the current book that I am reading the explanations are sometimes of little value/help: "His face has a veil of dark blue veins in it, like a soldier's face that has been too near a cannon mouth when it exploded" - not something too common in my world.
639: The main question I want answered is this: Does President Obama continue to smoke tobacco products? If he does and can't do a 'simple' thing like quit smoking and help his health and the economic impact of himself on the rest of the economy, he has no ability to execute a grander scheme on 300 million people. The real problem for America isn't lack of health care, its unhealthy choices that burden the system.
638: It is 3:45 AM. I am pretty sure that I have never laughed this hard at this time of day before. At least I don't remember doing so. But the source of laughter is far too complicated and convoluted and involves math and planets and ... well, tomorrow .... I'll have to write it all down, and those dishes aren't going to ...wash themselves. Swish. Splash. Swush. A night of double lasagne.
637: Spring? Its more like Sprung here, with snow on the ground and maybe more coming, possibly Sprang, Spry-ing or Spro-ing, but not quite Spring.
636: Yea! I finally got the movie 'Hachi : A Dog's Tale' on DVD
635: I don't believe in sorcery. I don't think people can predict the future. I do believe in religious freedoms. I do believe that if the Saudi government fears a Lebanonese TV sorcerer and condemns him to death, then they, The Saudis, are the more dangerous ones. After all, if the sorcerer could really predict the future,... wouldn't he have known the Saudis would arrest him for his "crime" ?
634: (Remember I do not endorse tattoos) I thought of another interesting design for a tattoo. It would be a picture of a doctor removing a tattoo using a laser procedure. But then it would probably look just like someone welding. "Hey, bro, nice welding tattoo"
633: The Swedish cartoonist Lars Vilks has caused outrage with millions of Islamic people by drawing the head of Mohammed their Prophet on the body of a dog in 2007. I agree, it is an insult to all dogs everywhere. Of course I'm not about to kill anyone over it. Sigh. Why is it that the children, I mean the puppies, have to suffer?
632: I have a saying for my nephew graduating from police academy this evening: You are entering a dangerous profession, "those who live by the doughnut, die by the doughnut".
631: The Federal Government "at" work "about" work: I received an automatic email notification for job searching on the 15th that I didn't notice until today - the 17th - for a federal job in Amarillo. When I clicked on the link to inquire about it, the job wasn't available. Then I noticed in the e-mail that the job CLOSED on the 15th, the same day! I'm thinking, "Thank you (?!?!?)"
630: Today's Piece of Wikipedia Math Silliness: One article about two computers, supposedly "IBM Supercomputers", that were never built and designs never completed over an 8 year period starting nearly 50 years ago.
629: If many more massive and minor earthquakes mantle mangle and crust bust Chile, it may soon be spelled ¢nii=
628: Today's Livro Laughter: "Look what the jellyfish has done to me" - very appropriate as the very last entry in the "Life's A Beach" section of my Arabic-English phrasebook
627: Three Point Something Day
626: My Dumb Joke of the Day: What did the police call the photo of the man they arrested for stealing the musical electronic synthesizer? His "Moog Shot"
625: We're all in our houses with wireless mouses.
[A friend responds that she is old school]
Actually I am now (much later) in the kitchen part of the house,
using my portable laptop on a table with an embedded invisible mouse.
624: Raw Hide Bone 1, Cooper 0 -> s0met1mes the 1nan1mate 0bjects have/get the upper hand. 1njur1es, Me1odrama, 0U-ch1es. But 1n th1s case, n0t f0r l0ng.
623: That was a scary moment - I just drove in front of a Prius
622: Ah, I just heard a far off low rolling rumble, a flame flicker, a blaze, a fan come to life, a furn-ace warm em-brace
621: Okay, I finally understand whats wrong with the U.S. Senate. Its when one senator can hold up everything. That sounds dictatorial, hostage taking, not a balanced representative form of government. If you can't understand this issue or its unfairness, you have no business being a senator.
620: A wind chime doesn't become one until you take it outside. While its still in the store its a CCD - 'Clumsy Customer Detector'
619: How often do you write your name out in a semi backwards last name first, first name in the middle with middle initials only on the end with comma separators on forms "Boston, Ernest, S B" only to wake up screaming in the middle of the night a few days later, "I'm not Ernest S B Boston!!!" ? Right; it never happens to me either.
618: Today's Discovery: B-o-ing. The springs on the inside of the free pens from the bank will make a dandy mattress for my pet squirrel. Boi-ng. One down, 471 more to ...slowly... collect so they don't get suspicious, and then Whuirrel gets a new mattress. Bo-ing. Break out the sewing machine and Dremil tool, its factory time!
617: White Light Bright Snow Blow Go South Face North Close Eyes Open Mouth Wide Snow Non-Cone On The Tip Of My Tongue No Flavor Except Cold Just Barely On My Bare Tonsils Bing Float Hover
616: Is it time for coffee yet? Please say it is, please (?!¿¡©¤££€€)
615: I had a wonderful surprise at the pawn shop a couple days ago. I met a young female Chihuahua. She was the most wonderful happy lively non-ferocious effervescent bubbly Chihuahua I had ever met. She was only 6 weeks old. I figured she hadn't had enough time to learn how to be a normal Chihuahua.
614: I have discovered an odd conjoined number jumble anomaly jungle in the otherwise glorious State of Oklahoma. I saw a stretch of road that had 3 numbers on it. I thought, that was odd, until I discovered an even stranger passageway, a stretch of schizophrenic asphalt where there were 4.
613: They are called 'Killer' Whales for a reason
612: ({{Pain}}) That kinda even looks like my headache, at least it does while I am having my headache
611: Progress!!! I have trained my dog to wipe his feet when he comes in from the muddy back yard. He follows my command/hand as he walks over a large towel a few times until his paw prints are negligible. Sometimes he even sits on his "Cooper Carpet"; he likes that term very much.
610: WI and MI - I just realized that two states are right next to each other that have abbreviations that can be easily transformed through a symmetrical process, depending on the font of course, and how much you squint your eyes. I wonder how many other states have this proximity and symmetry relationship and how does it effect the black market sinister trade in auto inspection safety sticker sleight of hand and XactoKnife?
609: [FACEBOOK GAME APPLICATION NOTIFICATION Tamie Boston cleaned up your stinking sewers in MyTown! Click here to return the favor! a few seconds ago] WRONG !!!! Its really HER town, and besides that, who was it that responded to her request in the REAL world 20 minutes ago, "Honey, could you check to see about the water running tooo loooong in the toilet?" At least that problem is on the NON-stinking side of the sewer system.
608: "Oh, the things we do to save the world" - Tamie A H Boston
607: Weather forecast: 50 percent chance of snow. I look out my window. The lawn is half covered in spots of snow. They got it right.
606: Yea! I am a little bit more of a Java programmer now! I got the JDK installed, and then just been playing with some Java programming of Euhler, then Runge-Kutta methods for numerically solving differential equations. This is my first time to get to really learn differential equations, so that means re-learning a bunch of calculus. The college semester of Laplace Transforms 30 years ago doesn't count!
605: [Am I living in a virtual world or a victuals world?] I had just got a note in Facebook telling me: Tamie Boston got your pollution level under control in MyTown! Click here to return the favor! ... BUT at almost the same time she was complaining about the smell of my ground buffalo cooking in the kitchen ... Yea! She must be getting well in the REAL world for her sense of smell is coming back.
NOTE: Just in case you don't know the word, 'victuals' was the term Grannie used on the TV show 'The Beverly Hillbillies' for 'food'. It sounds more like it should be spelled 'vittles'.
604: "Honest Officer, my wife really died from laughing. Just look at the smile on her face. I had starting humming a song that I wrote a long time ago and had forgot about, and one of my dog's favorites, I might add. When I mentioned it to her, she said, 'How unfortunate' - and then she died of laughter"
603: Hold it, what was that just now? Ice Roller Derby? [Oh! Lumpix Reference]
602: Ah, a cold winter day outside and me indoors washing dishes, who could ask for any thing better than this? Well, I guess I could ask for a buffalo steak already perfectly cooked w a side of Pork 'n Beans, world peace, and a new Toyota, but then I would have to go out into the brrrrrren wasteland. Back to a tubba happy sudz zanda cuppa hot cococa (insert wet cold smiley doggie face here)
601: So now my dog has a new "trick": Simultaneous Snoring and Dreaming. His dreams invariably resort to chasing and barking, so in hizzz immobile virtualizzzzed zzzituation, tranzzzformed into Simultaneous Snoring and Barking
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